Bloodtype Online

    This movie is set in a post apocalyptic world where a cyborg police force has turned on the human race and pushed it the brink of extinction.  The last surviving member of an enhanced unit of super soldiers joins forces with a beautiful resistance fighter in a last ditch effort to defeat the cyborgs and save the human race.  Together they attempt to penetrate the control center of the cyborg army and turn off the central control mechanism.  Do they succeed?  Is the human race saved?  Will this movie ever end? 

    The answers are yes, yes, and god it felt like it never would.  Some movies are bad in a cheesy enjoyable way.  While others are so ineptly executed that you just want to crawl into a fetal position and die.  This Last Sentinel would be the latter.  The story is a Terminator rip off.  I have no problem with a low budget cheesy movie ripping off the story of a larger more successful film.  In fact I’ve really enjoyed some of those movies.  But that doesn’t let you off of the hook when it comes to making a movie that at least makes a little bit of sense.  The story here jumps around so in time that I was lost thru most of the film.  Also the story is a bit ambitious on the budget that they tried to film it with.  You have an army that is large enough to take over the world, but they seemingly only have a few dozen guards watching their central processors?  Also since there are dozens of scenes where the cyborgs are standing less than 10 feet away firing machine guns at our heroes and can’t hit them I find it hard to believe that they were able to win any freaking war!  Honest to god Storm Troopers have a better aim (yeah I’m a Star Wars nerd!).  Hell not only can they not hit anyone but every one is able to sneak up on them and hide in plain sight!  You know I just have to stop before my head explodes.  This is when I normally mention the cast.  Well Don “the dragon” Wilson plays the emotionally stunted super solider.  Um well that really isn’t much of a stretch for him and I guess it is “acting”.  Katie Sackhoff plays Girl (yes that is her name god damn it), which means she runs around looking pretty.  Though I suppose she was unwilling to do the “side boob” scene herself so they clearly got a body double.  Unfortunately the body double looks nothing like her, and it actually a bit “mannish” in appearance.  I mean if you aren’t going to try and match it at least go and get a stripper who will show more than some “side boob”.  Is that too much to ask for? 

    Again I need to stress that this is a low budget movie.  In spite of that I was impressed with how well they managed the effects.  There is quite a bit of CGI, but it is mixed in with practical effects whenever possible.  There are lots of explosions and gunplay and if they had used CGI it would of looked terrible.  And that is about the only positive thing I can say about this one guys. 

    This is a bad movie.  If you really feel the need to watch this one then rent it.  Trust me this isn’t worth a purchase, even from the $4.99 bin at Wal-Mart.   

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